You do not have to tolerate abuse or toxicity from anyone. ESPECIALLY those you share DNA with. In fact. I would offer that rather than being more ready to ‘forgive’ someone from your blood family, perhaps they should have to work harder to earn your presence and trust. Because it is within the bonds of [...]
Tag: parents
Good enough is good enough
Raising kids is really really hard. There’s a constant push pull between letting them fall and helping them fly, not to mention an attempt to retain some identity other than X’s Mummy. So here are a few things I want to tell you about attachment theory: If they cry when you leave, it’s a good [...]
The complementary moral defence.
The Complementary Moral Defence Those that know, know that the narcissist believes they are the epitome of perfection. That when someone has a problem with the narcissist’s behaviour, it is THEIR problem, not that of the narcissist. It can be the most frustrating thing about interacting with a narcissist, they never accept responsibility, they devalue, [...]
Strict parent v Boundaried Parent
This is something I think about all the time. How many clients have sat opposite me telling me about their parent’s authoritative stance. The lack of collaboration, and instead have received harsh instruction. Rather than creating a human who is able to know themselves, know their self worth, use their voice, trust those in authority [...]
Narcissistic parents and the complementary moral defence.
I love the words in this image, because we repeat what we know even if that means ending up in abusive situations. The biggest problem with this is that when there is parental narcissistic abuse, sometimes those who have suffered don’t realise until they’re a LOT older and have already experienced abusive relationships. Narcissistic parents [...]
Autism Awareness – Communication 3/3
Okay, so today is all about Autism and communication. I’m mildly optimistic that this won’t be terribly long, because in parts one and two, I have addressed non verbal cues, social cues, and meltdown behaviour. In children autism is often indicated by a verbal delay, but from my experience, this isn’t always a strong indicator. [...]
Autism Awareness – Behaviour
Hello! So as I said yesterday on facebook, I wanted to run a series of blogs about Autism to raise awareness and understanding. Today’s blog is all about the traits we commonly see in autistic people, and how we can help people who face these challenges living in a world which is dominated by [...]
Narcissistic Parentification
So, here I am, the last in the instalments about parentification. Today’s offering is on Narcissistic Parentification. Grab a drink, a snack, and get comfy, because not only could this be long, but I suspect for some of you this might be painful, and I really want to ask you to keep yourselves safe in [...]
Instrumental Parentification
One of the things that I hear repeatedly in therapy is the parentification of children from a young age, particularly children of narcissists. It’s something that parents need to be very careful not to do to children, so as to avoid the impact of that behaviour, which I’ll explain later. So, I guess the first [...]
Toxic Masculinity
Okay, I’m going to try and venture into this topic. It’s contentious. I truly believe it’s a thing, and I also believe that it’s as damaging to men as it is women. What is toxic masculinity? You all gave such interesting answers; answers that gave me food for thought, and also helped me understand how [...]
